TP Gnomes Mug — A Ceramics Meditation on Urgency
COMING SOON
Poured from the lineage of Bauhaus restraint and diner-counter bravado, this vessel explores the
liminal moment between inspiration and intestinal negotiation. The joyful gnome—brandishing cellulose
like a renaissance banner—suggests triumph over chaos, while the stark typography whispers,
danger is a breakfast condiment.
Parody art. Limited firing. Hand-wash your choices.
Couture Tees — The TP Gnome Capsule in Wearable Irony
COMING SOON
Cut like a confession, draped like a rumor. This capsule borrows from streetwear’s swagger and
late-night laundromat melancholy, resolving in silhouettes that let the textile do the talking while
the gnomes do the yelling. A thesis in premium cotton about the fragility of dignity.
Editioned drops. The tag itches with purpose.
Shower Curtain of Doom — Domestic Opera for Porcelain Stages
COMING SOON
Baroque fury meets spa-day sanctum. A choreography of paper, rage, and redemption that
nods to Renaissance martyrdom paintings and New York bathroom lighting. You don’t bathe
behind this curtain—you bathe within a narrative arc.
Water-resistant, plot-absorbent.
Street Justice Deck — Kinetic Toiletry in Maple
COMING SOON
An ode to Dogtown film grain and alleyway chiaroscuro. Seven plies of Canadian maple hold a
miniature riot: flight, fright, and flatspot. When the flash pops, the gnomes aren’t graphics—
they’re accomplices.
Grip tape may judge you silently.
TP Gnomes Gulfstream — The Aerodynamic Apocalypse
VIP CONTACT
A palatial missile for those who no longer queue. Golden-hour reflections kiss the fuselage while
operatic gnomes sermonize on velocity, legacy, and the sacred ritual of airborne privacy. Borrowing
from mid-century luxury and post-internet maximalism, this aircraft is less transportation than
manifesto.
Contact Us — For Real Diarrhea VIPs
Serious inquiries; unserious branding.
This boutique is a parody experience. Any resemblance to your real life is purely aspirational.